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Monday, April 05, 2010 Mr X
I saw X today. The X i met 8 years ago.

My eyes glued to his. I hope that he would notice me, but he din. I saw the cigarette in his hand, smoking a puff as i walk pass him. He was with a few of his friends, one with a girl under his hands. My head adjust every single moment when he walk pass me. When he was already behind, i closed my eyes. I turn to the opposite direction and stare at him. I wish we could talk. I wish we could still have that awkward feel. I remember the fear i have for him and the bits of excitement when he saw me. Im feeling sad. I miss him. It has been 5 years since i have seen him so close. Yet part of me wanted to hide away from his world.

Botak, his friends might be right.. he went to NS. A few moments after i stood there, his friend turn around and caught me. I turn back and started walking. I turn my head, caught by the same person. I turn my head once more. X and his friend turn theirs. I keep walking and never turn my head again. I knew, he din recognise me.

My face was still in shock after walking myself to the level one toilet in westmall. I look at mirror, almost tearing up. Im so sad. Disappointed. Emotionally flooded. Im happy that i saw him, im sad that he is still the same. My hopes were once again destroyed. :( I really hate this.

Im not in love with you, im sorry.


6:47 AM

WEI

The happiness of life is made up of minute fractions—the little soon-forgotten charities of a kiss, a smile, a kind look, a heartfelt compliment in the disguise of a playful raillery, and the countless other infinitessimals of pleasurable thought and genial feeling.